Emo died in 2006, and “The Black Parade” was the album that killed it.

My Chemical Romance apparently thought generous applications of “guy-liner” and swooping haircuts weren’t embarrassing enough, so the band recorded its infamous full-blown emo rock opera.

Shortly after “The Black Parade” went platinum, “emo” became a punch line, and My Chemical Romance faced an ultimatum: change or fade. It changed — polishing a stadium rock sound on 2010’s “Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys” — but its most recent album, “Conventional Weapons,” is the album that could have been.

Released as a compilation, the album is a collection of tracks written, recorded and scrapped for a “Black Parade” follow-up. It makes for a highly entertaining listen to a band in flux, with one foot resolutely planted in brooding emo and the other stepping full-force into arena anthems.

When My Chemical Romance sticks to its punkier, emo guns, the result is ear-bleedingly awful. Singer Gerard Way shrieks his way through opener “Boy Division,” and what could’ve been a cool guitar solo from Ray Toro gets lost in painful squeals of feedback. Way worsens on “Tomorrow’s Money,” slurring through incoherent verses and rushing to a chorus that flatlines with cringe-worthy lyrics like, “fell in love with a vampire.”

Most fans’ knee-jerk reaction would be to jump ship after the first three songs — “Ambulance” is a real snoozer — and it’s hard to blame them.

But from the opening snare drum kick of “Gun.,” it’s pretty clear exactly when My Chemical Romance switched gears and dropped the emo shtick. Way finally sounds like he’s having fun, and “Gun.” is a fist-pumper of an anthem. Using “Conventional Weapons” as an album title was perfect: the album sounds like the band is armed to the teeth with hooks.

Even tracks that resemble rewritten, sad ballads get injected with pomp. “The World Is Ugly” is a lush, sweeping slow dance song, clocking in at just less than five minutes. As lovelorn as its lyrics are, it stays uplifting and vibrant. The album’s second whopper of a ballad, “The Light Behind Your Eyes,” starts with Way crooning over an acoustic guitar before building its bombast for a rousing finale.

The band also puts together some in-your-face choruses. “Surrender the Night” brushes through sleepy verses for one of the group’s best choruses to date, and drummer Jarrod Alexander puts on a clinic on “Burn Bright,” a feel-good tune that lyrically tackles the thoroughly anti-emo idea of “like who you are.”

But the band follows up its two ballads, both aching with emotion and understated instrumentation, with two slapdash garage-rock yawners. “Kiss the Ring” is a ho-hum White Stripes wannabe, and “Make Room!!!!” changes tempo at random, jostling the listener’s eardrums around at whiplash speeds.

Fans should be thankful this wasn’t the album we got after “The Black Parade.” For all its standouts, “Conventional Weapons” is kind of a mess. It’s the product of a band that didn’t know whether to go for the gusto or give fans another “Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge.”

In all its Hot Topic glory, “The Black Parade” was an album written by a band that wanted to raise the bar for emo. And for its overblown, space-age nonsense, “Danger Days” was penned by a band confident enough with its fan base to go out on a limb and take a 180-degree turn away from emo.

“Conventional Weapons” tries having it both ways but ends up with neither. My Chemical Romance should’ve kept pushing forward on its next LP and left these scraps on the cutting room floor.

Published on February 19, 2013 at 12:36 am

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