It’s that time of year again. It’s painful. There’s almost always a surprise or two. And you’ve known it was coming all year. I’m not talking about finals week – although that’s a good guess.

I’m talking about May sweeps.

Sweeps is the deliciously difficult point in the season when television networks cart out all their best content, and it starts Thursday. With all that fun, there’s definitely a catch. Once you’ve seen mind-blowing television, the great TV gods take it away until September, when the new lineup starts.

The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.

During sweeps, some of the questions viewers have lost sleep over are finally answered. They might witness the telltale signs of a sparking romance or feel the fallout of a mysterious accident. Sadly, all of the important questions won’t be answered for another four months.

While you’re on your couch trying to figure out what the heck Emily Thorne is planning for her next season on ‘Revenge,’ there is a group of writers out there cackling over the mental trip they’ve sent you on.

I’ll never forget the first battle wound I suffered during May sweeps.

I’ll let you in on a little secret: I’ve been a fan of The CW’s ‘Supernatural’ since day one. It’s still running and in its seventh season. But back in 2006, its first season finale rocked me to the core in a way I’d never experienced.

Everything was going well until the last few seconds. I was so distracted by an intense father-son conversation that when a truck crashed into the side of the Winchesters’ Impala, I had no idea how to react, other than falling onto my bed with a loud whine. All three members of the family were unconscious with nasty-looking head wounds and I wouldn’t find out their fate until September.

These are the complications suffered during the tumultuous period of sweeps and finales. Everyone’s so excited to know what happens in milestone episodes that they forget the emotional emptiness suffered once the episodes are over.

It’s like Christmas morning after all the presents are opened. You don’t have to wonder what’s inside all the nicely wrapped boxes. The excitement is over and, regrettably, it’s your favorite character’s untimely demise waiting for you at the end of the episode.

Luckily, there are a few ways to get over a post-sweeps funk. The best option is to immediately jump into a new show. It’s like a rebound relationship but better because it involves fewer poor decisions and more of Alexander Skarsgard from ‘True Blood.’

Summer is the time for trashy television and crazy blockbusters. By getting sucked into whatever incarnation of ‘The Real Housewives’ is currently being peddled by Bravo, who can worry about the next season of ‘Glee’?

Surprisingly, there are some summer shows with substance for people who are into that kind of thing. AMC’s ‘Breaking Bad’ starts its final season in July and promises its usual sharp storytelling. Critic favorite ‘Louie,’ helmed by stand-up comedian Louie C.K., returns to FX on June 28.

Hopefully, no one is going to feel the sting of May sweeps for too long. A new TV obsession might be a good quick fix, but summer offers so many better distractions. With any luck, we’ll all be too busy enjoying the beach, summer flings and doing absolutely nothing far too much to worry about our favorite television shows.

Ariana Romero is a sophomore magazine journalism and political science major. Her column appears every Thursday. She can be reached at [email protected] or followed on Twitter at @ArianaRomero17. 

Published on April 25, 2012 at 12:00 pm