Gender and Sexuality column

Be a bromosexual, but don’t call yourself one

Sarah Allam | Illustration Editor

The coining of the term bromosexuality may signal a change for hyper-masculine ideals.

You’ve probably heard of a bromance. But you probably haven’t heard of a “bromosexual.”

Bromosexuality is an emerging term which is cheekily used to describe a straight man who is comfortable forging meaningful relationships with his gay friends.

What’s troubling is the possibility of a collective desire of wanting to call this supposedly newfound idea anything at all. There’s risk in boxing yourself into a term such as being a “bromosexual.”

Sometimes guys just need to cry, talk, hug or cuddle — but satisfying those needs through a male friendship is not a precursor to establishing some sort of rigid sexuality.

Robin Riley, director of LGBT Studies at Syracuse University and an assistant professor of women and gender studies, said a society’s tendency to reinforce labels often holds people back.



“I think everyone agrees that the categories we currently live with are limited and unnecessarily restrictive and not realistic,” Riley said in an email. “Both gender and sexuality are more complex than the existence of concrete categories would suggest.”

Unfamiliar with the term “bromosexual,” Riley pointed out that “it has a long way to go until it actually signals a movement or changes in masculinity.”

She couldn’t be more right.

Although The New York Times published a piece in 2016 about the rise of the “bromosexual” friendship, pointing to its increasing depiction in media, the term “bromosexual” is a double-edged sword.

It embodies a freedom and fluidity that is needed when it comes to understanding sexuality, but labeling it as bromosexuality can be unnecessary. It creates a rigid social construct — that’s why the increasing popularity of the term could be problematic.

But it’s still important to take the leap. Explore. Experience. Expand your boundaries. Just remember you’re not a bromosexual. You’re just you.

Michael Sessa is a Gen + Sex columnist and a freshman newspaper and online journalism major. His column runs biweekly. He can be reached at [email protected].

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