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Stevens: Takeaways from the 2016 Golden Globes

Some people might call some of Sunday night’s speeches memorable, but none of them included anything that will be talked about come Oscar time. It’s time for award shows to come up with less annoying and pointless play-out cues, since Hollywood has learned how to talk over music. It used to be that people just got mad when no-name producers talked forever. Now, does anybody even care about Leo thanking his friends?

Anyway, the ceremony on Sunday hinted at what the Oscars might look like, and it seems to be a showdown between “Steve Jobs” and “The Revenant,” which is somehow so much less exciting than last year’s contest between “Birdman” and “Boyhood.”

In the end, the Golden Globe Awards was about some people not caring at all and some people caring way too much, just like any other award show. But I still can’t wait to hear what Ricky asked Mel Gibson.

Here are my picks for Sunday night’s real winners and losers:

Winners
• “Mozart in the Jungle” — What?
• Whoever decided “The Martian” is a comedy
• Jim Carey’s attempts to tell people awards don’t mean anything
• J-Law and A-Schu
• “The Revenant” — because of the way Harrison Ford said it



Losers
• Play-out music
• Ricky Gervais’ attempts to tell people awards don’t mean anything
• NBC
• Mel Gibson
• Mel Gibson’s face
• The movies that lost to “The Martian” as a comedy
• People who live-tweeted the whole thing

Click here for a full list of the “real” winners.

Kyle Stevens is a sophomore advertising major. You can email him at [email protected] or reach him on Twitter at @kstevs_.





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