Friend groups all across campus reached their boiling points this weekend after Justin Bieber’s “Sorry” was played one too many times at various pregames.

“Sorry” is just the latest in a string of recent J-Biebs hits including “What Do You Mean?” and “Where Are Ü Now” that have generated a startling resurgence, as well as a pandemic of “Bieber Fever.”

With his re-worked, catchy electronic-pop sound and production by artists such as Diplo and Skrillex, Bieber has molted his “middle school R&B” image and elevated himself to transcendent superstar status.

Some however, have been reluctant to accept the transition, and any casual glance across a room during the first few seconds of a Biebs banger this weekend could find reactions ranging from ire to elation.

While some on campus are working to perfect their “Sorry” dance, others prefer not to acknowledge it exists at all.

“I feel like I’m losing it,” said senior economics major Simon Dredger. “Are we really all so willing to accept that mop-headed wiener no one could stand in high school? He could write the catchiest song of all time and I’m still going to steal the aux cord and put on Fetty Wap four seconds into it. It’s just not right.”

Others have been more accepting of the bandwagon, citing smooth, soulful vocals and selective production as the recipe for tasty jams.

“Do I like Justin Beiber as a person? Honestly, maybe. He’s got a Lambo and a monkey which is objectively pretty cool,” said freshman Luke Broadwayne. “But if you’re not on the J-Biebs bandwagon right now you’re kidding yourself. You’ve got to be able to separate the artist from the art. Is Woody Allen a creep? Yeah, probably, but I still really like ‘Annie Hall.’ It’s the same principle.”

Still others have seen the recent Bieber tracks as a flare-up of their Bieber Fever, which has merely lain dormant for a few years.

Among these faithful includes Sarah Cuthbert, an undeclared sophomore in the Martin J. Whitman School of Management who said, “I seriously can’t believe anyone’s even denying his greatness at this point. He was great then, he’s great now and if I hear one more person complain about ‘Sorry’ I’m going to start bashing heads.”

When pressed about her passionate opinion, she conceded that she and several of her friends are no longer on speaking terms thanks to dissenting opinions about The Biebs; a recurring theme around campus.

Belieber or not, Bieber’s recent releases have indisputably torn a sizeable hole in the social fabric of the university. While some wait excitedly, others fear the worst is yet to come as “Purpose,” Bieber’s forthcoming album, is due to release Nov. 13. What started as innocuous case of Bieber Fever could soon escalate to Biebonic Plague, and all we can do is brace ourselves for the fallout.

Evan Hohenwarter is a senior advertising major who is almost as modest as he is handsome. He can be reached at [email protected] or on Twitter at @evanhohmbre.

Published on November 10, 2015 at 8:46 pm