Sex & Health

Silvarole: Columnist offers advice on maintaining long distance relationships

Relationships are like boats — they’re great to say you have, but they’re nothing unless you can take them out on the water and know they’ll weather the storm.

More often than not, long-distance relationships die out because of reasons other than the geographical location of your partner. Keeping your relationship from sinking isn’t always easy, but there’s more than one way to make sure you and your partner are on board for the long haul.

As much as people in an LDR would love to be with their significant other as much as possible, it doesn’t work that way. Between weekend visits and school breaks, you have to find a way to make it work and to make it work for the best.

There’s a lot of advice out there on how to keep the wind blowing in the sails of your relationship. Cosmopolitan suggests Skype sex and surprise packages, and AskMen supports a fun social life and erotic emails. I encourage someone to find out how well Durex’s Fundawear, underwear that your partner can interact with on their smartphone, works and tell me whether or not I should invest in a human-sized body pillow.

One of the most important things to keeping your love-boat afloat is making sure mates are clear on the expectations of the relationship. Lay down the rules and let it sink in what’s OK and what’s not.



Be your own person. Know who you are on your own and you’ll have no problem loving and understanding someone else’s personality and decisions. Have your own friends and activities where you are, and let your significant other do the same. It’ll make being apart from one another much easier.

But keep things interesting. An AskMen article suggests using a hands-free device for phone sex or sending your scallywag dirty fantasies via email. Snapchat isn’t a bad alternative either. I’m personally a fan of sending your pirate some booty in the form of a surprise package full of their favorite candy and thoughtful love letters.

Don’t put up with anything if someone breaks the rules. If kissing someone else at a party was an agreed no-no, drop anchor and don’t convince yourself it won’t happen again. Maybe you agreed on one slip up, and your partner hooked up with a girl from down the hall. It’s up to you to decide what you’re worth and what you’re willing to give for this relationship.

When you are together, make the most of the time you have. Get up for coffee, but sleep in until noon if that’s what you both love doing. Make time to patch your sails — real-life sex beats Skype and is a great way to reconnect.

Set your sights ahead and find things to look forward to, but don’t dwell on how far away they are. Setting sail for a bright future helps to see through any storm you might get caught in.

Ship happens. LDRs are the farthest thing from perfect, but they can work if the whole crew can communicate and steer clear of anything that screams “shipwreck.”

Georgie Silvarole is a sophomore newspaper and online major. Her column appears weekly. You can reach her at [email protected] or on Twitter at @gsilvarole.





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